When you wake up to soft sunshine peeking through your curtains, and inch in to the bathroom to wash your face perhaps, do you find yourself standing there with your bare feet on cold tile, face to face with someone else staring back at you from your mirror? To be honest, there are times when my own reflection scares me. Not in a horror-movie sort of thing. But there are times when I stand in front of a mirror, and I begin to really see who my reflection is......and what's scary, is it isn't really me.
It seems that I tend to focus on the outside. As long as people see me with a smile, and that happy-go lucky attitude, I feel safe. If I can just convince the rest of the world that I'm perfectly fine, then I find myself believing that I am fine. It can seem so much easier to live on the outside of yourself..... and avoid who you really are on the inside.
The person I really want to be isn't on the outside though. The hair, the freckles and smile.....that's not who I want to be. I don't want Taylor to be just another pretty face out of a billion beautiful other human beings. Why do I spend so much time trying to perfect the reflection I face every day? I want to be remembered for my heart, my spirit...who this young girl really is. The things that I love, the things that I burn for. My passions, my desires...... One of my favorite sayings is
" Do not live your life for what you can gain, instead, live your live your life for what you can leave behind."
Don't live your life trying to gain beauty, or worldy pleasures. What about you are you going to leave behind for others to remember? Don't focus your energy and attention on the mirror. Let who you are inside reflect onto what others see. Let the reflection you find yourself faced with be the image of Christ. Not you. Who do you find deep down inside your eyes? What is really behind your smile? Are you really who you try to persuade others you are.....because no matter what everyone else sees in you, God knows who you really are.
Psalm 139
O LORD, You have searched me and known me.
You know my sitting down and my rising up;
You understand my thought afar off.
You comprehend my path and my lying down,
And are acquainted with all my ways.For there is not a word on my tongue,
But behold, O LORD, You know it altogether.
You have hedged me behind and before,
And laid Your hand upon me.
Such knowledge is too wonderful for me;
It is high, I cannot attain it.
Where can I go from Your Spirit?
Or where can I flee from Your presence?
If I ascend into heaven, You are there;
If I make my bed in hell, behold, You are there.
If I take the wings of the morning,
And dwell in the uttermost parts of the sea,
Even there Your hand shall lead me,
And Your right hand shall hold me.
If I say, “Surely the darkness shall fall on me,”
Even the night shall be light about me;
Indeed, the darkness shall not hide from You,
But the night shines as the day;
The darkness and the light are both alike to You.
For You formed my inward parts;
You covered me in my mother’s womb.
I will praise You, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made;
Marvelous are Your works,
And that my soul knows very well.
My frame was not hidden from You,
When I was made in secret,
And skillfully wrought in the lowest parts of the earth.
Your eyes saw my substance, being yet unformed.
And in Your book they all were written,
The days fashioned for me,
When as yet there were none of them.
How precious also are Your thoughts to me, O God!
How great is the sum of them!
If I should count them, they would be more in number than the sand;
When I awake, I am still with You.
Search me, O God, and know my heart;
Try me, and know my anxieties;
And see if there is any wicked way in me,
And lead me in the way everlasting.
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